We Need Happy Mothers every Day

I am realizing the significance of taking care of ourselves as women.

Two weeks ago I was asked to teach in my church in a way others might be scared of, but for me was a breath of fresh air after 3 years of filling out secretary worksheets (definitely not my thing). Afterward, I felt I did well, and to get just a little praise from others gave me a new energy and a  confident calm to go about my week with a relaxed efficiency I had not experienced in a long time.

I was happier, and that was nice, but the thing that surprised me was that my children seemed happier. For the first time ever Bowery Bird cuddled with Canary in the morning in the room they share instead of ignoring her cries for mom. I heard her play with her more during the day and actually say "I love you." Mockingbird is usually very affectionate, but recently it has been constant instead of sporadic bursts with moody thunderclouds in between. The usual squabbles were there, but so was more affectionate interaction and just a more loving atmosphere.

I think the children in a real way picked up on mom's relaxed peace with herself. I wasn't as flustered or frantic as I felt confident in where I was--and my children felt it spill over to them. This really hit me. I am looking at how to make our homeschool and life in general less "speedy" and more "meaty" and truthfully- our lifestyle is NOT fast to begin with.

This little realization helped me to see how backing off a little can bring big dividends and my own self sets the thermometer for everyone else--more than I realized.

So, in searching for how to keep this feeling for myself, I found some good articles, which will make good fodder for our next Mother Daughter Project Group too.

Tips on finding time for yourself from CNN on How Moms Can Make Time for Themselves.

Essentially, it comes down to finding what rejuvenates and doesn't leave you feeling guilty, scheduling it in, and then not freaking out if life interrupts that-or if your plan interrupts life.

An article on a women's mental health called The Emotional Crisis between Mothers and  Daughters by Rosjke Hasseldine from The Silent Female Scream. (great web address)

Hasseldine concludes that Mothers who inherit a circumstance or belief of not emotionally taking care of themselves will develop unhealthy ways of releasing this frustration, often projecting it on or ignoring their daughters, who then perpetuate the same cycle.
This article is a wake up call to take care of ourselves. We're adults here. No one else is going to do it for us, or set the example of how to do it for our children.

Finding More Me Time on how to streamline what you have to do. I read somewhere that women spend 12 hours less a week cleaning than our 1960's predecessors. But because the expectation for parenting has taken off in a helicopter, so to speak, we don't necessarily get to enjoy that time and yet feel the stress from the same standard of cleanliness expected.

I would love it if I was the last person on earth to figure this stuff out, but I doubt it. We all want to do our best at taking care of the people in our lives we've been blessed with, but need to remember that taking care of ourselves is also taking care of them. Then we all can truly have a Happy Mother's Day--everyday.

Maybe even better since today I've been in bed with a fever...

Outdoor Time

This week we've done more outside than usual. It's as though we have crossed that bridge and are done tentatively welcoming spring, and now accepting his warm companionship without guard.

We did Geography outside, visited a new splash pad in Springville, Homeschool Field Day at a park, and today instead of Saturday morning cartoons (gag me) I successfully swept them up the Provo canyon to Big Springs trailhead (we never do the full hike the first time--it takes us a good four attempts to really discover the reason for a trail's name...)

Everyday we were out I felt so good about just being out and feeling alive and having my children enjoy real life--and then one of them will say something like "hey, the water cylcle-like on Bill Nye the Science Guy--remember 'hey, where'd you go guys? Oh very funny!' " or  "this Centipede is like the one in James and the Giant Peach."

 OK the latter was actually me and the former an educational program, but that's all I can remember. Lately, it makes me cringe to repeatedly hear real life compared something on a screen.
I remember my first trip to NYC was like that though. Everything was compared to what I had seen on Sesame Street as a child; the subway driving away with a number 3 on it, brownstone steps, yellow taxicabs with numbers, etc.

More often I wish we were reading and comparing things in film to our real life.
Which came first-the chicken or the egg?
I guess I am just feeling that my children will see the world as an example of something they've seen on a screen, when really it's the opposite.

I want them to have experiences that build them with all the senses, not detached observations of another's creating. I know I'm over-reacting, we do compare a lot of real life to books we read etc. That seems to be the time I see that conversation happening more, but if I hear one more Plants vs. Zombies level described with the enthusiasm of an Olympic gold medlist--I just may pull a Winter of Our Disconnect on everyone...just kidding. Not really.

The Trolls

Instantly one of my favorite books, not only for it's fresh and accurate take on the absurdity of family life, but for it's absolute uniqueness in having a final sentence that stays with you for weeks.

(Spoiler Alert)

The girls loved the silly family stories and quirky aunt who told them, evident as we shared our favorites.

We talked about characters, and plot, and other elements that just came off as fun. But I think it was setting that held the crux of it all as our discussion naturally pulled us to ask the girls things like:

Where father grow up? Canada
And where did he live now? Ohio
How do those two settings differ? One is wild and green and near the ocean. The other is flat in town.
We then pulled out a US map to see where these two places actually were.
Do you think the distance between the two geographically is supposed to mean something in the story? The father tried to forget where he came from, to distance himself.

Do you think the Trolls were real? Yes/No
If they were real, what do you think the Trolls were? Wild things that took away and never gave back.
So what did they take away and never give back? Their brother.
How do you know? Because after that he never bragged or followed them around again.
What do you think the author is trying to say with this book?

Robin of Locksley

I began to understand Robin Hood's character better in stories with my first Y2 student 2 years ago.

This version is from the My Book House set which any Charlotte Mason fan would drool over. I found my incomplete set at my 'local charity donation boutique'. It has I think 12 in all and is based on classic stories to progress with childhood years. I am on a quest to track down my missing volumes, and someday they will all be mine....

We read a version of Robin Hood by Howard Pyle (angle choirs-I adore this man--almost as much as Robin Hood himself).

 It fortuitously has explanations in the sidebars so you can know the difference between a crow and a daw, and what a "butt of ale" actually is (though discriminating Y2 students prefer "barrel, mom. It just sounds better." Plus we can color the black & white woodblock prints, although I would have preffered Pyle's still....

We listened to blackstone audio- OK, but a bit boring honestly.
But, it's my reading (and explanations after laughter subsides) that we return to.

We watched Eryol Flynn in black and white. OK
Then Disney (VHS) Robin Hood and His Merry Men. My favorite, by far.
Now the awakened Y2 student "Whose your favorite person mom? Mine's Maid Marion-I didn't expect her to be so bad--wearing boy clothes and messing up Robin Hood's shooting and joining with Robin Hood" I think feisty just isn't her vocabulary yet.

Then we came upon this book of the ballads and gorgeously illustrated.

 

 

Cardboard Cathedral part II

 

 This is an example of several things:
1-A Medieval Cathedral with flying buttresses, stained glass, and transverse architecture.
2-A creation I was way more into than my kids were.
3-A school project I can drop, unfinished, without any guilt while the fun is fading.

 

But it was still fun.

Here are some of the pieces before I hot glued them together:

 

 

Tower

 

 

Side and buttresses; these were simply stuck into the slits I cut in the sides. They didn't even touch the ground and were what I like to think of as a truer flying buttress.

 

 A detail of the Bible stories in the windows (Noah's Ark, David & Goliath, Moses and the staff/snake)

 

People going to church above the "cat rooms where the dead people are."

That's catacombs, dear, and those are the columns in between.

 

And a view from above. It's a lot simpler than it looks, glued in only 7 places. I just realized I had scored the top half of the walls and was going to hot glue them to a peak...maybe it will happen before the dumpster recycling bin, maybe not...